Welcome One And All!!!

If you're here that no-doubt means that I know you anyway and begged you to come here on my hands and knees, but that in no way makes me any less ecstatic that you came anyway ^ ^

Here I'm gonna be posting:
- Any random stuff that comes to my mind: poems, stories or maybe even drawings
- Things that I find in my everyday life that I find amusing
- Pictures I have taken that either aren't shit or that make me happy/laugh
- Insightful links to (hopefully) broaden your horizons
- Fun things to fill everybody's waking hours with
- My thoughts on worldy happenings and issues, which will hopefully not be as boring as it sounds
- Films, games or anything I experience and think are worth sharing with everyone
- Anything interesting I actually do, which as many of you probably know, is a rare occurance at best.

This wil NOT be a place for:
- Telling you what I did every second of my day
- A diary
- Any kind of place for me to get depressing or sad
- Things that don't constitute atleast an "event"
- Any trouble of any kind

This will be a happy, entertaining, sharing place, with nerry a frown to be turned upside down anywhere.

So, now that that's out of the way, allow me to formally invite you all to:

MY BLOG!

Oh, and P.S. everybody hit subscribe over there on the right... you see it? Okay, good ^ ^ Thanks everyone!

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Story For The Elderly

His name was Bob, he was a bin man. One day Jim woke up and made his way to school, where all his work mates were waiting for her. He all went to get some breakfast. When they had finished their dinner they made their way to the construction site. At first, Alan was fine, printing papers like he did every day, but then she began feeling all funy. It was that time of the month. Luckily for Hannah she only worked weekends so seeing as it was a Thursday there was no cause for alarm. On his way to the bathroom Mark was distracted by an advert on television: “One Way”. Turning his car back round and going back the way he came he noticed something strange; it was October. With this startling revelation Janice fell off her stilts and into the lap of an over-excited patron whose hands began to go south. When the patron’s hands reached the crotch and felt Paul’s penis he got very angry, and you know what they say “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!”. Infuriated, she grabbed John by the breast and threw him out of the window. Landing on top of a bus however, luckily, was second nature to Sandra and so she came out of the ordeal relatively unscathed, apart from a twisted nut-sack and ruptured womb. Once the helicopter reached it’s destination Fred let go of the pilot and strutted into the shop. “8 ciders please” She told the barmaid, before settling down with a woman in the Highlands. They lived in a small cottage before they got divorced and were forced to share the kids between the 4 of them. Our hero, Mick, was forced with custody of all 87 children. Unable to feed them all with only her 2 breasts, Jemima had little choice but to adopt 13 more and start up a circus. Securing the bank loan for the airport was the easy part, the hard part was where to put it: on the left or on the right? After settling on putting it North, Brian made his way up to bed and set his alarm clock for tomorrow, after all, It was gonna be a busy day at the White House…
-GaZZuM

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The World's Most Enticing Job Advert?

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